THE FAMILY BLIND DATE: I'LL HAVE SOME MORE OF THAT!

I think I'd like to have my mother set up more family blind dates because I'm rather bored at the moment and, frankly, the FBDs are quite fun for the following reasons:

1) The mystery: I don't know about other peoples' experiences with family blind dates but mine always have elements of mystery thrown into them. For instance, during the last FBD, I didn't know the name of the guy with whom I was being matched, what he looked like, or where he lived. All I had to go on was his age and his occupation. What a brilliant way to pique a single woman's (trepidatious) interest.

2) The drama: Let's face it folks, the FBD gives me something about which I can bitch and gripe. My life isn't all that interesting (whose is, really, anyway. Liars, all of you raising your hands!). Add to that the fact that I like talking and having people listen to me (I'm convinced this is a by-product of being the youngest child) and is there anything better or more foreign as a FBD to hold others' attentions. And I won't lie: I love drama. I believe in drama. That feeling of building things up to an emotional crescendo assures that life will never be boring or bland.

3) The relief: Once the FBD begins, the emotional crescendo, that combination of anger, frustration, fear, humiliation, and anticipation will deflate as rapidly as a pin-pricked balloon. The realization that all I have to do is sit back and talk (everyone knows how much I love to talk) and GET THIS OVER WITH is a cathartic experience, as satisfying as the drama leading up to it.

4) The comedy: Even in the midst of griping, bitching, stomping my feet, the general distress and an overwhelming feeling of being railroaded, I'm very aware of the entertainment and comedic value of the FBD, as is everyone else. At the core of it, all of my drama is comedy. Knowing this keeps me sane.

5) That glimmer of hope: Wrapped up in the crazy mix of emotions leading up to the FBD is always that hope that, by some miracle of miracles, I'll end up meeting a great guy. Stranger things have happened, dear reader.

I'm so telling my mother to start up her matchmaking ways again! This should be fun (or something).