Monday, February 12, 2007

THE COUSIN TRAP: EW

*please note that all names have been altered in this post to protect both the identities of my extended family as well as my own hide. I don't have an Aunt Humera or a cousin called Sheila. They go by different names in real life.

Amma: Remember that single doctor your cousin told us about?
Nerddd: The 40-year-old doctor from, where was it?...Arizona? Alaska?
Amma: Don't exaggerate! He was 37! I think it was South Dakota...hmm...or was it North Dakota...
Nerddd:...
Amma: Well, anyway, the doctor who you rejected without even looking at his photo--
Nerddd: Last time I checked, there weren't so many publishing opportunities in either of the Dakotas...
Amma: Fine. Well, I told your cousin to put his family in touch with your aunt Humera's family. They're looking for your cousin Sheila, after all.
Nerddd: And, how did it go?
Amma: The boy and his family flew out to visit Humera and the family and each side LOVED the other.
Nerddd: They flew down from the Dakotas??
Amma: Yes, because they're serious about marriage unlike those boys you always end up meeting.
Nerddd: But the boys I know don't need their moms to set them up with girls on the other side of the continent, which is a plus in my book.
Amma: You know, back in my day, girls wanted good boys. Now that seems to be out of style.
Nerddd: Okay, let's get back to Sheila and Mr. the Dakotas. The families hit it off. What are they going to do now?
Amma: Nothing is official yet but I think we're getting there...
Nerddd: Amma, that's great! You were like THE matchmaker on this! They'll owe their happiness to you. Or maybe their misery but we'll cross that bridge if we ever come to it.
Amma: So, I was thinking...what do you think of Sheila's brother?
Nerddd:...(pause)...you mean my cousin?
Amma: I saw some newer photos of him. He's VERY attractive.
Nerddd: ...and he's my cousin...
Amma: ...plus he's a doctor...
Nerddd: ...plus he's my COUSIN...
Amma: ..but he's single!
Nerddd: ...my single COUSIN...there's no amount of.. I don't know, ah, ANYTHING that will make me want to find marital bliss in the arms of my COUSIN.
Amma: Fine. Times have changed!
Nerddd: I just threw up in my mouth. I hope you're happy.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you are attracted to white guys, why don't you find a Muslim convert or maybe a guy who will convert to Islam for you. :)Sometimes it is hard to be attracted to someone that is just like you.

zee said...

hey
wish you happy valentines day ! :D

DC Girl said...

I Love You Sabila!

Terra Shield said...

Hey Nerddd...

I nearly died reading your post! Your mom's statement about good boys reminds me of my mom...

nusrat said...

I bet your cousin asked your Mom to hook you two up.