THE EYES HAVE IT

I was almost convinced that the bitch optometrist was jealous of my long eyelashes and wanted nothing more than to yank them out when she reached for the eyelid numbing solution.
The solution worked like magic. I couldn't feel anything so I put a stop to the fluttering eyelashes allowing bitchy optometrist to flip them inside out.
You see, my eyes have been terribly irritated for the past several days. Not only have they been puffy and itchy (especially at night) but I awoke this morning to find that my eyelashes were practically matted with eye gunk. Ugh. (I know that's gross and probably too much information, but deal with it). I nearly had an anxiety attack as I drew up a mental list of possible diagnoses while washing out my eyes. Somehow, all of the diagnoses involved eye removal and glass eyes. Then I proceeded to miss my train because the damn turnstile wouldn't take my PATH card, and later, I spilled coffee on myself on the street. Sigh.
I made an emergency appointment with my optometrist's office (I won't say which one but can reveal that it's an independent eye doctor's office, attached to a larger store that sells eyeglasses) and hauled ass back to Jersey during my lunch break.
I've never seen this particular optometrist before. Boy was she a biatch. She was young-ish, probably a few years older than me, which may be why she was on such an "I-am-an-optometrist-and-you-my-lowly-can't-flip-her-eyelids-inside-out-patient" high horse.
"How many hours in a day do you wear your contacts?" she asked, rolling her eyes and smirking as I did the math.
"You don't wear daily disposables, do you?" she asked, rolling her eyes again.
"Let's flip your eyelids inside out," she said, grabbing my eyelashes and rolling her eyes as my lashes kept fluttering.
"Okay," she announced with a frustrated sigh. "Let's make this easier for me, shall we?" she said as she rolled her eyes, smirked and reached for the numbing solution.
I was inspired to kick her ass.
But I didn't. Because I needed a cure. And if one of my eyes had to go, I wanted her to recommend the best goddamit glass eye available.
Okay, so the diagnosis wasn't quite as dire as the ones I imagined: the inside of my eyelids had an allergic reaction. She diagnosed an anti-inflammatory eye drop. I am now cured.
But the entire experience left me with a couple of questions: do optometrists have to go to medical school? If not, what the hell was with that chick's bitchy attitude? If they do, what the hell was with that chick's bitchy attitude?