Thursday, February 14, 2008
CONSIDERING VALENTINE'S DAY
Most of my readers know that I've long been a passionate detractor of Valentine's Day. And yet, I've spent the past couple of weeks mulling over this most bogus of holidays. Why? Well, for once, February 14th does not find me alone. Should I reconsider my hateful position on a day that does nothing more than promote love and those disgusting albeit charming little candy hearts? What came first: my hatred for this offensive commercial exploitation and perversion of an entirely overrated emotion or (I'll just say it) the fact that I was one of those girls in my all-girls high school, who resorted to grumbling about commercial exploitation and overrated emotions when we saw the secretary's office overflowing with bouquets of flowers delivered by horny teenage boyfriends because we secretly wanted to have horny teenage boyfriends? Most importantly, does having a boyfriend mean that I must sell-out to Hallmark and become just another Cupid drone?
The answer is hell no!
Thinking deeply about Valentine's Day has helped me recognize that my hatred for the day is genuine, ardent, and deep. Though I may love love (as well as flowers), I certainly don't have any love lost for Cupid and his exhibitionism. Get a room, you jerk, and a pair of pants won't kill you!