Tuesday, June 05, 2007

CLOSE ENCOUNTER WITH A SOUTH ASIAN AUNTY or YET ANOTHER CALGON-TAKE-ME-AWAY MOMENT IN THE LIFE OF OUR NERD

I ran into an old family friend at the mall last week. As I fully expected, our conversation quickly segued from courteous greetings to the woman reassuring me that I need not fret about being single in my late 20s because even though I was old by South Asian marriage standards, at least I looked younger than my age.

I fought the urge to suplex her.

She proceeded to tell me that she might have one or two potential suitors for me and that I should have my mom be in touch with her. When I thanked her and told her that I wasn't interested in being setup at the time, she said [cue: Twilight Zone theme] that she'd prefer continuing this conversation with my mother and that I should know better than to meddle in the business of elders.

I disengaged myself from the conversation before I could triple-jump moonsault the idiot.

8 comments:

bigkahuna said...

Did she actually use the term "meddle"???

While the triple-jump moonsault is an effective maneuver, I prefer the "Atomic Starcrusher" followed by "Death glare".

I've also found the "puppy eyes" and "booboo lip" work pretty well...


Eh, forget it - stick the the Atomic Starcrusher...

SabilaK said...

No way man. We were conversing in Urdu, so I've had to translate here.

SabilaK said...

I'm also a fan of the cobra clutch.

Anonymous said...

Oh Sabilak, you slay me with your indifference to my (admittedly) weak attempts at engaging your attention...

'Lost in transaltion'

Anonymous said...

:o) - I totally understand!

My mom called me at work today to tell me that a family friend's son, who is my age and already -GASP! - 'married with one kid and another kid on the way'! (what am I as a girl doing at 27 not married!)

I fought the urge to tell her its not my fault he can not use birth control and told her instead I had no idea what I was supposed to do about that and that I could not argue with her at work

Have a gorgeous summer evening :o)

Craig said...

I love the use of wrestling terminology!

Anonymous said...

Bheti, what is a nice girl doing going to malls without their parents.

Cyberfish said...

Bheti, what is a nice girl doing, going all wwe nitro on some guy?
Dont forget the camel clutch...but that may be before your day. And now that I look back on it...stereotypically racist since the guy who "played" the Iron Sheik probably wasn't Arab.