Wednesday, October 24, 2007


It's a little past 8 in the evening and I'm sitting in my hotel room in my pajamas, feeling like a prat for not being out on the town but being too knackered to do much more than eat, blog, make a few phone calls, read, and sleep. I woke up this morning, thinking that it was surely 6AM and being disappointed when I realized that it was actually only 1AM. I ended up lying in bed for another two hours, fretting about being wide awake in the middle of the night, with not a bit of drowsiness to my name, before I finally and rather miraculously fell asleep again, only to wake up what felt like a split second later to my 6:30AM wake up call (I was both relieved and disappointed that the concierge hadn't forgotten about my wake up call like he'd done yesterday. I know, right??!).

It's been bloody parky out here in London these past couple of days--although I rather enjoy parky weather, I unfortunately failed to pack parky weather-appropriate outerwear for this trip--so I decided to wear a pair of black stockings with my mini dress and boots, only to be revisited by the maddeningly irritating spirit of static cling. Naturally, I'd failed to pack the dryer sheets that MP so thoughtfully gave me on Friday, so there I was, my skirt scaling my legs again with a staticky zeal that drove me insane.

I dialled the concierge and asked him if the hotel carried anti-static spray.
Excuse me? he asked.
Anti-static spray, I repeated.
Express checkout? he asked.
No, no, I said, tugging the hem of my skirt away from electrically charged stockings, AN-TI STA-TIC SPRAY. For static cling, you know? STA-TIC CLING.
EX-PRESS CHECK-OUT? he asked again, his voice carrying cautious optimism.
No, not express checkout! Static cling! Static cling! Like what happens when your clothes stick together? Static cling!
I was getting worked up and ready to go downstairs and volunteer myself as living evidence of static cling but he quickly muttered that he didn't understand (he must not wear stockings) and transfered me to a female attendant at the front desk.
Would you happen to have anti-static spray? I asked, sighing.
Express checkout? We do-- she started and I wondered why the bloody prats who bloody worked at this bloody hotel kept on bloody hearing "express check out" each time I bloody said "anti-static spray."
Anti-static spray. Like what you use when your clothes stick together because of static electricity--
Electricity problems?! Now I understand! You should call--
NO, NO! Static! STA-TIC!
Well, sorry, I don't think we have any of that.

I ended up walking to the drugstore next door, where a kindly female employee, who seemed to know a thing or two about static electricity told me that--get this--it had been years since she'd last seen a can of anti-static spray (what are the Brits doing right, is my question) in London but that I should spray the afflicted areas of my clothing with hairspray.

I sprayed my skirt and tights into a firm hold that even a determined gust of wind shouldn't have been able to move. But, alas, the skirt continued to climb the stockings until I, utterly defeated to nylon, stole to the ladies room and did away with them. Though freezing for the remainder of the day, I was relieved. I was relieved.

Finally, don't eat sushi in London. I bought what looked to be lovely rolls at a Japanese takeout place, was asked to pay extra for wasabi, soy sauce, and ginger and discovered while eating my dinner that the Brits seem to enjoy their sushi with the least possible amount of fish and a whole lot of rice.

This city, however, remains charming and I can't wait to explore it this weekend! Woohoo!

I'm exhausted.


googliboo said...

Sabilak, you have a knack for writing, I'll tell you that! U had me doubled over with laughter over your static cling/express checkout story. Enjoy London, and bring back a little piece of it for me. Maybe I'll get to meet u one day. By the way, is it just me or do I sense a hint of the British accent in your writing already?

Anonymous said...

Sabila, go to Zuma for sushi. Trust me. AJ

Cyberfish said...

Hate to be the bad guy on this one, but with regards to sushi, the brits have it right. Of the hundreds of known types of sushi, only a small fraction of them actually contain fish. For all intents and purposes, sushi is merely seaweed, and rice. Everything else is cream. Fish is an American fascination. In many places in Japan there are only two BASIC categories of sushi, those with fish , and those without it.

Cyberfish said...

The last statement is a bit of an oversimplification but its more or less true.

DC Girl said...

I'm so glad i own one pair of stockings...and its still unopened.

i LOVE London. Every time I go there, its like visiting an old friend.


By the way, I am officially a D.C. resident. Got the license plate and license yesterday. Woo Hoo!

Anonymous said...

Hello Sabilia, I hope you are well. I’m new to your blog, kind of just stumbled onto it. Like so many others before me, I’ve become a little smitten. It is very difficult to find beauty combined with intelligence, confidence, wit, passion, good values (I know a certain anonymous begs to differ, but you are fine by my standards) and most of all the ability to not take yourself too seriously. Contrary to what some of your readers think, there are Pakistani guys who have the balls to approach someone they like/see potential with and make a sincere and genuine effort to get to know them.

I’m sure you’ve been hit on before on your blog and have your reservations, so let’s work through some of these concerns.

1) Should you really be meeting some random guy that you know nothing about?
2) There may be some potential between you and MP, so why ruin things now?
3) You are a busy woman trying to balance work, friends, family and a personal life, so why should you take time out of your crazy schedule to meet?
4) How do you know you will be safe?
5) Why the rush, why can’t you get to know me better (forget better, since I posted anonymously anything about me would be nice)?
Enough of the pessimism, now the glass is half full part-

Countermeasures -
1) You’re right; I am some random dude, but so what. You have met other strangers on this blog that I’m sure you have developed a friendship with.
2) MP may be the one or may not. If he is then it will be easy to dismiss me even if we get along, a sort of test. I don’t the situation so I’m not going to judge, but my philosophy is that if you find something good, then you go for it with everything you have. In my book, the risk of losing someone due to inaction is worse than trying and failing.
3) Of course you are busy, and so is everybody else. You’re a romantic; do you really want to use the excuse that the daily grind prevented you from taking 30 min. out of your day to meet someone who may change your life forever. At the very least you will meet someone new, have some coffee and food, and you’ll be on your way.
4) You pick the time and the place. Pick the busiest café in the area at the heart of lunchtime; whatever makes you feel comfortable.
5) Nothing beats sitting across the table from someone and seeing if there is chemistry (despite what the auunties may think, we all know how important this is). Let me provide you a snapshot of me to see if it sparks your interests:

Physical: I have all my hair, eyesight is pretty good, workout regularly, and the rest well will be for you to judge. Enough people have found me attractive to give me that reassurance we all need, but then enough have not shown an interest so it prevents me from having ideas of grandeur that I’m a Pakistani Brad Pitt.
Profession: While you are from the refined world of literature, I am from the coarse and rigid world of the military and law enforcement. I couldn’t pass up jumping out of airplanes, leading soldiers, traveling the world and putting bad guys in jail. I know these are unorthodox career choices for a desi, but one must have the guts to follow their heart. (Sorry guys, I can’t fix anyone’s parking tickets).
Religion: I respect my faith, but tend to lean on the liberal side.
Sports: Love to watch and play most sports. I am a Yankees and a baseball fan, but my true love is football. Nobody breaks my heart or brings me joy like the Dallas Cowboys. Go Boys.
Family: I’m as close to my family as your appear to be with yours. I’m also the youngest.
Literature: I read quite a bit, but primarily non-fiction. I love politics and history.
Diet: Meat eater, but love cholay and daal. Vegetables, not so much.

Fellow readers: sorry this is so long and maybe a little boring. Your patience is thoroughly appreciated.

MP: you are a talented writer, big ups to you for that. I’m sorry if I’m messing up your game in any way, but until Sabila advises otherwise, I have to assume she is still unattached.

Sabila: I wish I discovered your blog earlier, but you got to take things as they come. I’m positive we will have different perspectives on many things, but to me that’s a good thing. I want someone that will force me to look at life from different angles, someone I can learn from. I’m not your run of the mill guy, but I am decent and a good blend of western and eastern cultures/values. I’ve lived a rich and wonderful life and now am looking to share the rest of it with the right person. You seem to have a great brain, a good heart, and you make me laugh - the rest are details that can be worked out. My gut tells me you're special so I hope I do hear from you. Enjoy your trip.


Anonymous said...

K is nothing but a player.

Rabs said...

K, your comments are useless without pictures. ;)

DC Girl said...

wow. the drama on the comments continues.

sooooo amusing.


So brave of you, K, to put your biodata out there. Kudos for being so gutsy! Good luck man.

My votes are *still* with MP.

DC Girl said...

Dear Sabila--

Ummmmm...are you back yet?


I don't even WANT to know how MP feels?

How *do* you feel MP?


googliboo said...

Competition! Sabila, you are the leading lady in this fabulous reality blogsville-movie. Do I see a love triangle forming? I feel like I have trickets to the front row megaplex theater...I see the plot thickening. Where is the popcorn? :)

Anonymous said...

that "K" fellow has nothing on MP. good luck, buddy. you will never be able to win sabila over with those prose. ha!

Anonymous said...

I think K has class. He shows respect for MP and Sabila and still offers the invite for a fun meal or coffee.

Anonymous said...


Perhaps a seemingly random question, but do you happen to be wearing slips under these dresses? I've found that for me, the only real way to combat static cling is a slip made of a thick silky material.