So, I expertly manuevered myself out of having to attend not one but two weddings this past weekend. "But amma, I have SO MUCH reading to do," worked for the first wedding; "But amma, I already have plans with my friends," with a "Why didn't you tell me sooner. I'm going to miss out on SUCH a GREAT matchmaking opportunity!" thrown in for good measure worked for the second wedding.
Amma met up with a gaggle of her girlfriends at the second wedding and, upon her return, she spent a good hour bemoaning my absence from the nuptials:
"EVERYONE was asking about you and all of the women admitted that they were there to find single girls! Oh Sabila! You need to start attending weddings. You aren't getting any younger..."
Of course, as (my miserable) luck would have it, we met a woman at the Pakistani Independence Day street fair (or another WONDERFUL matchmaking opportunity according to my mom)who sized me up, declared that I was pretty and pulled out a pen and slip of paper to take down our number.
"How old is she?" the woman asked. Mind you, I was standing right there.
"27," I announced, smiling and standing up a little straighter, knowing what was about to come.
"Ohh, she's too old to get married now," the woman announced.
My mom, who is just as aggressively amiable as I am, smiled and said something about kismet and such things being out of our hands.
"Yes, but we're supposed to try. We can't leave everything to kismet," the woman preached. She actually looked annoyed with us.
I had to keep myself from laughing in the woman's face. Surprisingly (and much to my relief), my mother wasn't too bothered by her since we'd already had a countless barrage of women inquire about my availability for their cousins/brothers/neighbors/dentists/cabbies etc. Of course my mother responded to each woman with a "Yes, we're looking." Of course this response, as often as I heard it over the course of the day, threw me off guard. "We are?" I wondered each and every time.
I suppose we are.
Oh, the lengths I go to to keep the parental units satisfied...and my readers entertained.
And, worry not. I'm constantly working on my emergency escape plans.