Wednesday, August 23, 2006

THE NERD GETS NO LOVE AND BREATHES A (SOMEWHAT OFFENDED) PHEW



The following conversation with my mom took place earlier today:

Nerd: So, how's finding me a husband going?
Amma: Not so good.
Nerd: (gasping) What?!
Amma: (sighing) Well, I knew this time would come. We used to get dozens of proposals for you--DOZENS!--and you made us keep turning them all away. Now people don't think you're serious about this. They think twice about sending us rishtas...
Nerd: That makes no sense! Are you saying I have a reputation in matchmaking circles?...Actually, that's kinda awesome...
Amma: You keep turning away proposals and eventually you won't get any proposals.
Nerd: Amma, I couldn't have accepted every single proposals. I'd have like 20 husbands right now!
Amma: Step 1, take this seriously.
Nerd: This is a 12 step program?
Amma: Step 2, give me a biodata! I've been asking you for too long now.
Nerd (mumbling): Sure, I'll have one for you soon.

I won't lie, dear reader: as lightly as I'm taking this bs process, I'm a little bit offended that the rishtas (proposals) aren't flooding in. I mean, what's the point of practicing escape strategies, if there aren't any horrible blind dates from which to escape in the first place? I'm afraid I've exceeded my shelf life by dumb Desi standards.

As far as the biodata goes, I have writer's block. Yes, I'm having difficulties penning a CV of my own life. Dang, that's sad.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Mommy seems a tad frustrated with the Nerd's antics, what...

mist1 said...

Don't be offended. Clearly, they are intimidated by your excellence...at least that's what I tell myself.

Zee said...

don't forget to list your requirements as well!

bigkahuna said...

Hmmmm. Start your Biodata with a link to your blog! If a person can't get a sense of who you are from your blog I don't know what kind of jackhammer it would take to nail it into their skull. ;-)
Definately not the most desi-thing to do - but it is honest.

Outta curiousity - prior to your Amma disclosing "dozens" of previous proposals - how many rishtas would make up a flood in your mind?
Second - where are the biodatas from potential suitors? This is a two-way street, no?

SabilaK said...

Anonymous: Yah, she doesn't think I take these things seriously. Ahem.

Mist: THEY CAN'T HANDLE THE NERDDD! FOOLS!

Zee and BK: Well, my mom is pretty much dealing with folks (my cousins, her friends, etc.) who are acting as brokers. It is with this segment of the desi population that I seem to have a reputation...Whatever. Yah, they best send me some freakin' Pulitzer Prize-worthy biodatas because I'm already getting bored! Fools!
I kid, I kid (well, mostly anyway).

Jill said...

I am so jealous of you. My parents are all talk, no action. Once they tried to set me up with a farmer, but I don't think that that counts.

SabilaK said...

Jill: Was he an old farmer. Are there even young(er) farmers in America anymore or do they, like women named Olga or Dorothy, emerge old and weathered and arthritic from the womb?

mAn[S]o0r said...

lolz @ exceeding shelf life by desi standards!! :D