Nerddd: Hey, so we've decided against taking Amtrak up to Maine. It's a 10 plus hour trip! JetBlue flies up to Portland for dirt cheap prices.
BFF: Maybe I should call Rich and apprise him of the flying-with-Sabila experience.
Nerddd: Oh, but I've totally gotten over crying during take-off and turbulence! That being said, I know I'm going to regret not taking the train the second I step into that plane.
BFF: Well, it's not like your track record with trains is any better.
Period of silence during which Nerddd considers her experience on trains.
BFF: Will you guys rent a car from Portland?
Nerddd: Yeah.
BFF: Will you drive?!
Nerddd: The reason I'm practicing as feverishly as I am is because I want to make sure I can drive on the highways of Maine...there is one problem though.
BFF: What's that?
Nerddd: Rich can't parallel park and, though I learned how to K-turn and parallel park this past Sunday, I've already forgotten how to do both. I can't be trusted to parallel park or K-turn anywhere, let alone in a strange new state.
BFF: First, there's no parallel parking in Maine. I imagine Maine to be a state of parking lots, many, many parking lots. Secondly, if by some stroke of improbable bad luck you do find yourselves and your rental car in dire need of parallel parking, the locals will be more than delighted to help out. I imagine them to be impossibly friendly. Just don't tell them you're Yankees fans. As for K-turning, let's hope Rich knows how. Otherwise, you're both fucked.
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6 comments:
First, and not to make you even more nervous than you already are: Portland is all parallel parking. Solution: don't park in Portland! Get out of there the day you fly in.
Second: Agreed, do not tell anyone you're a Yankees fan. Although with things going so swimmingly for us this season, the attitude toward citizens of the Evil Empire is bound to be more generous than usual.
Ron:...what are double parking laws like in Portland...
You folks up north are way obsessed with our Evil Empire, btw.
Rich: there goes our lunch in Portland.
oooh...going with Monsieur Rich are we?? Just out of curiousity, how do the 'rents (given your ethnich background) feel that you're going with a boy? My parents would have a fit...
Sabilak,
Good luck in finding a nice muslim boy to marry you now... now that you've made public you enjoy going on weekend trips with boys...
Anonymous:
That's a relief since everyone knows nice muslim boys are boring.
Sabilak: Well, if by boring you mean having a sense of their cultural and religious identity then yes, they truly are no match for your wonderfully carefree and myopic view of life...
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