CREDIT CARD CONFUSION

I was recently notified in a letter from my credit card company that I had something like a million airline miles. Unfortunately, they weren't the three trillion I would need for actual airline tickets (lying, scummy bastards!) but seeing that I couldn't roll them over into next year (stingy, cruel bastards), I could "purchase" magazine subscriptions with my points. And so I chose about eight magazines from the selection I was given only to receive yet another note about a week later informing me that one of my magazine choices--Lucky-- was no longer available and that I'd have to choose from one of the following publications:

Black Enterprise
Golf For Women
Out
Teen Vogue
The Advocate

Clearly, my credit card company seems to be under the impression that I'm a black lesbian executive, who plays golf and has a teenage daughter.

Clearly, I need to divorce myself from my credit card company.

If anyone's interested in knowing, I chose to go with Teen Vogue. Ahem.